Others Judging Me for What I Eat

I finally realized after many years that this group of people I see are causing me a lot of anxiety around food.

I don't share food with them often. It's pretty rare that I do compared to how often they share food amongst themselves. Anytime I offer something healthy, they always turn it down. I made something really healthy last week and brought it with me, but there was no interest.

If I share something sweet, they sometimes have some, but not always. I don't like to share with them, especially sweets, because they like to say, "You're a bad influence," even though our tastes in food are drastically different.

Sometimes they beg me to order them sweet drinks and I usually decline. I shared some really expensive pastries with them recently, only because I couldn’t hide them before getting them home, but honestly I didn't want to share. They wanted to take a piece of every single one to taste all of the flavors, but I said no. I didn't want them all cut up. They still had some.

A few days after, they told me I ruined their weekend because the pastries caused them to struggle all weekend with overeating and eating too many carbs.

I'm scared to talk about food around them. There have been times that I mentioned a name of a food and it triggered their anger. I personally don't get cravings from food discussion even though I'm a chronic overeater. I would have to smell it for a craving that strong to trigger. Even though I can't relate to that, I try to be helpful and in most recent years have stopped talking about food around them.

There have been other comments over the years. I'm the heaviest one in our group, and there is some evidence of them disliking my weight, or being embarrassed around me.

I started eating better for myself last week, but I'm dreading their reactions when they realize what I'm doing. I wish I could just quietly eat without loud comments from them about what I'm having for lunch.

How do you deal with people like that?

submitted by /u/Cattenbread
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