Extreme diet recovery, seriously need advice!!

About a year ago I began to go to the gym and counting calories, the first 3 months went great but then I got greedy and slowly developed ed (how ironic ikr). Went I saw my weight didn’t go down as much as I expected, I cut down the calories to about 700-800, didn’t eat rice at all for 4 months and went to gym 5-6 days a week and my weight went down again (but just a little). There were days that I eaten nothing but yogurt and some fruit but I couldn’t lose weight.

I did some research and figured out that maybe my body went into starvation mode and my metabolism was completely destroyed. Yes, I did realize how serious it was so I started making some efforts to fix it. I ate more, still counting calories ofc, around 1,200-1,500 (my TDEE is 1,800) I eventually had 2-3 cheat days (<2000 calories) and I willing to gain some weight back in order to heal my metabolism.

Besides I also drink lots of water, go to the gym 1-2 times a week, eat veggies and protein but after 4 months my metabolism seems to be not go back to how it was before the diet :( I gained back almost all the weight that I’ve lost still eating 1,200-1,500 a day. Now if I remain eating strictly like this, my weight stays the same but if I have some meals out, it go up and I need to cut the calories down again for the next few days. I cannot live like this for the rest of my life, I still in my 20s.

I’ve struggled with this issue for the past 4 months and really really tired. Did anybody go through the same issue with me, could you give me some advice? Could my metabolism ever healed and how much time it might take?

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