18f, 5’2”, sw: 170.8 lbs, cw: 168.4 lbs, gw: 125 lbs
I love food. I always have and always will. It’s so good, and for the past 18 years of my life, I’ve used it to celebrate my highs, and comfort me at my lows.
I have always been embarrassed of my weight, and despite my love for food, I was always ashamed by the foods I ate and the amount that I would consume, because I knew it was the cause for my serious weight gain. When looking towards the future, I always envisioned living a skinny, healthy life, but I never thought about what I had to do to change it. I always stood by my terrible eating habits, hoping one day it’d all just magically fall off.
I remember, in the past few years, I’d think to myself, “I can’t wait to go to college so I can eat whatever I want, and however much I want”. Now that I’ve committed to a college and am so close to moving out, it’s crazy to think that I no longer have that same mindset. I no longer wish to binge my heart out or continue my unhealthy relationship with food. I know it might seem premature to say, as this is only day 12 of my WLJ, but I’ve never felt/thought this way the other times I attempted to lose weight. This time, I see it as a permanent lifestyle change. This is not an 8 months (tops) thing, where I can resume my old life once I shed off all of the weight. I no longer view food as a source of comfort, but fuel. And I’m no longer taking my body and health for granted. I am choosing the steps towards a brighter future, and a happier, more confident self!
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