Need advice on what I should be doing at the gym, feeling fat and clumsy

6'3" M 20 126kg

I signed up for a gym membership with my sister in the hopes that we would go together, as I'm not very comfortable in that environment, but shes pretty adamant on only doing cardio, so I have to go alone if I want to do anything else. When I used to go to the gym 2 years ago (before i put all the weight back on like a dumbass), I used to solely use the weight machines, however this new gym has very few machines and a lot of free weights. I want to do a P/P/L routine, but I feel uncomfortable doing a lot of the movements, because its harder to perform them cuz im fat, (especially squats) and also doing them infront of other people makes me feel awkward and clumsy, and its a really busy gym. I know people say that no one is noticing you at the gym, which i used to find true, but there is quite a few older people at my new gym, and in the few times I've gone, I keep noticing them looking at me from the corners of my eye, and it making me feel super clumsy and awkward when i go. So basically my question is this: Should I just do a cardio routine until I lose all the weight and then start bulking up from there, or should I lift while cutting (my GW is 90kg). If I were to keep up a lifting routine, what advice do yall have that can help with getting comfortable? If I were to do cardio only whats the best approach?

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