TLDR: wore a size “SMALL” dress from long ago, cried.
About four years ago, I put on a size “small” dress for the first time, and it fit. I was so proud of myself that I took a picture of myself in the fitting room and sent it to my parents. I bought the dress, but over the next few years, I gained all the weight back, plus some.
Last Friday, I wore that dress again for the first time in years. I’ve been talking to my parents about my (re)weight-loss journey, and told them about wearing that dress.
This weekend, my dad sent me a sweet text message, along with that picture I sent him years ago wearing the dress in the fitting room. I know he meant well, but it really hit me hard. I immediately started crying looking at that picture. That version of me feels far away, separated by so much trauma and hardship. I have fought my way through hell to get back to get back to this point.
I still have a ways to go to get to my goal weight. I am proud of the progress I’ve made so far, but I’ve gotten to this point before and let it all go. I’m terrified of that happening again. I’ve surprised myself w my self discipline (I’ve had a Jimmy Johns chocolate chip cookie in my fridge for a week!) but I’m just so scared of falling back into my old ways.
Trying to trust myself, this process, and CICO. I am so thankful for this community. Thanks fellow “losers” - for sharing your experiences, vulnerability, and tips.
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