I'm 16 years old, can't exactly live by myself. And I'm 400 pounds. I really don't know how it got this bad, well I do know, I don't exercise and I eat too much, but that's that. I've been trying to lose weight since I was in 4th grade. I don't recall ever being a normal weight. I have never experienced not being obese. As you can imagine, this weighs heavily on me (lmao) and I thought about killing myself my freshman year of high school. I am now in a better place mentally (as in not suicidal) but I wouldn't go as far to say I'm happy.
My only goal in life is to join the Army. That's it. No lofty goals of attending Harvard or becoming a doctor or an actor or a singer. Just joining the Infantry and having a chance of being shot at. The Army isn't gonna accept some 400 lb 18 year old, so I gotta square myself away and shed some 200 lbs while getting into shape. I had mild success earlier this year, losing around 20 lbs. But I went back up. I stopped lifting (if you can even call it that). And I started eating very very poorly again. Just for some background, I alternate between my mother's house and my grandmother's house. My grandmother's house is packed to the fucking brim with shit nobody needs. Ice cream, Reese's cups, chocolate milk (or some say choccy) and things too calorie dense to name. Every fucking cupboard is full of cheetos n shit. My mother's house is less so, but it still tempts me every time I leave my room. and 90% of the time I simply cannot resist the temptation, my fucked up brain puts this temporary pleasure in front of my long term goal.
I've tried talking to my parents and grandparents about this but it's been futile. I know I could lose the weight if the shit wasn't just right in front of my face. I have two sisters and they buy most of this stuff for them, they're young and run around literally all day so they don't really gain that much weight, but tbh they're getting a little pudgy. My mother insists she's there to help me along, as she struggles with her weight also, and I have no doubt that she really fucking wants to see me lose the weight, but holy F U C K man, quit buying all this shit. Maybe I'm selfish for expecting my family to quit buying junk food, but I honestly don't think I am.
Sorry for the long rant. I just wanted to vent and maybe get some advice on my situation.
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