Hi there, r/loseit.
So, recently, I had a conversation with my stepdad and sister, and boy, did it piss me off a lot.
Let me explain a few things about myself before I go into how god awful the convo was. So, I'm an abnormally short transgender woman (not taking estrogen yet), standing at a petite 4'8" or 142 cm tall. My peak weight is 150 lbs (68 kg, 10.7 stone). However, I currently weigh around 130 lbs (59 kg, 9.3 stone) after being on a 1200 calorie diet for quite some time now. My goal would be 90 (41 kg, 6.5 stone) because I aim to be very thin, and I am very strongly under the belief, and I think I'm right in saying that my goal is NOT unhealthy. Yes, it is thin, but it should be common sense that being thin does not mean you have to be freakishly skinny to the point where a small burst of wind can knock you over to Mars. Healthy thin people are obviously a thing, but my stepdad and sister just don't get it.
The conversation went something like this.
Stepdad: So, how much do you plan on weighing?
Me: Well I want to be quite thin.
Stepdad: Hmm, how thin?
I have a brother who is 5'3" (160 cm) and weighs around 110 lbs (50 kg, 7.85 stone). We'll call him C.
Me: Well, not too much bigger than C to be honest.
What's weird is that people don't really give C much shit for his weight, but when I want to lose weight because I'm sick of my large size, they freak out.
Stepdad: Woah, that might be too low. How much do you wanna weigh specifically?
Me: Perhaps around 90 pounds.
Stepdad: Yeah, that's definitely too low. You should shoot for 100 or 110.
I should've asked the mofo "Why?". Because I feel like he can't really provide a good reason for why I should weigh that much other than "I just can't imagine you being thin because you've been an obese piece of shit your whole life." This might explain why people don't give a damn about my brother's weight but will constantly give me shit for mine. He's be thin all his life. He used to even weigh around MY goal weight at one point, standing at 5'3". He gained weight, but even when he was underweight, you wouldn't hear very many people talk about his weight in a bad manner. Anyway, after my stepdad starts telling me how much I should weigh, my sister chimes in, and she says something so gross, stupid, and offensive to me personally, that I just wanted to punch her shit out after she said it.
Sister: Why can't you just stay 130?
Me: Because it's grossly overweight, maybe? And my ideal body type is not to be grossly overweight.
Sister: Yeah, but I've known you as a fat person my whole life, and I just can't see myself adjusting to you being thin.
What she ACTUALLY meant by this is that she hates that she won't be able to constantly fatshame me anymore. Keep in mind, both my stepdad AND sister fatshame me, but my sister does it more. She calls me names based off my weight all the time. Yet, she wants me to remain overweight for some reason? Hmm... I wonder why. 🤔 As for my stepdad, he's the one who is 5'10" (178 cm) and weighs over 200 lbs (91 kg, 14.3 stone), but when I weighed 150 lbs, he would tell me that I'm "bigger than" him. What's mostly fucked up about my sister attempting to police my weight by suggesting that I remain nearly obese is that my weight has caused me a lot of trouble, not just in terms of physical health, but mental health as well. My weight has lead to me having depression, a lack of confidence, even suicidal thoughts, and it's caused me to be fatshamed by many people. Yet, she has the NERVE to say something so repulsive and vile. Really, it's people like this that just piss me off. I feel so infuriated because of this whole situation.
I turned to here to rant, but I'd also like to hear from you guys. If you have similar experiences, please comment. I'd love to hear!
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from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2uVkpMA
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