F, 34, 5'5, don't weigh myself
I've been at an unhealthy weight for around three years; I never weigh myself but I go by clothing and how I look in the mirror, which for me is the best way. Anyway, two months ago I decided to just start going to the gym after seeing a really unflattering picture of myself at university. Also, I'd been rejected by someone who said I wasn't their "usual type" and, as well as the overall weight thing, I just wasn't looking after myself. No skincare routine, bad personal hygiene, scruffy clothes. So that was a big kick up the proverbial, too. I'm quite sure I just wasn't attractive ENOUGH for this person (and any other person, too - I was not looking after myself or being the best version of myself)
Anyway. I've lost weight. I was wearing a men's XXL. I'm now down to a men's L (I wear mens tops because I have broad shoulders, and I just prefer men's fashion lol) and I feel considerably better about myself. I keep my skin clean, improved my personal hygiene, working out four/five times a week. I know I've made progress.
But I still feel fat, I still feel like that person I saw in the photograph. I feel as if someone's going to take a picture of me, and then I'm going to be shocked and see that I actually haven't changed, or something. Is this a common feeling after losing weight? Because I thought I'd feel a lot more confident. I do sometimes, but today I have to go out in a very light t shirt (It's hot) and I'm feeling really paranoid, that I look fat or something. I really thought that losing weight would bring all sorts of confidence but I feel really deeply conflicted.
Also, my clothes. I lost weight so that I could fit into my clothes, but I seem to have dropped down way too much and they're all too big now, which is quite funny I guess.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2O7kJQI
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