My 600lb Life…
I’m really not sure where or how to begin but I know I must. I am a 20 year old guy who lives life at 602lbs. I have a BMI of 67.8 thanks to the fact that I am 6’7”. I am not healthy at all, I have aches and pains, my weight will kill me. I am fortunate enough to still have mobility, I can walk, jog, sprint, squat, drive, fly on airplanes, etc. Most people at my weight can’t do most of what I wrote. Lately however I am starting to notice my body deteriorating, simple things are getting harder. I struggle to put on socks, I can barely wipe my ass, I live in fear of taking a fall, showering is a bitch. There is so much that I could go on about but this is the life I chose for myself. It was a choice because there is no way to accidentally get to 600+lbs, it just doesn't happen.
Being this size also causes mental damage because my self-worth is hurt, my self-image is damaged, and my confidence is fake. I present an image of a big strong man that is ok with whatever but honestly things hurt, I choose not to hangout with friends because I don’t want to be the only fat person there, I feel like a perpetual 3rd Wheel even when hanging out with groups of 5-15 people. I just don’t fit in because of my size, I can’t do the things these people are doing, I don’t want to swim at swim parties because I am ashamed of my body. So because of my size I force myself to be alone because I feel I’m not worth it, that I am just in the way, or because I don’t feel like the people I call friends are really friends, but rather aqquantances. I mean I don’t know a lot about the people I hang out with occasionally, I’m just there, a friend of a friend thing. Maybe that is why I don’t go, because I feel I don’t really have friends there. But even if that is one reason the biggest reason is my weight and just being uncomfortable with it.
So what is a day in my life like?
8AM - Wake up
9AM - Leave for work
9:15AM - Stop for an Extreme Sausage Sandwich for breakfast at Jack in the Box (~650 calories)
9:30AM - Arrive at work
12:30PM - Lunch with the team at Burger Joint (~1500 calories)
1:30PM - Back to work
5PM - Leave the office and get a snack 2x 20pc Chicken Nuggets from Wendy’s (~1800 calories + sauces)
5:30PM - Get home and eat
9PM - Dinner order Papa Johns, entire cheese sticks, half of a large pizza (~2500 Calories)
1AM - Go to Sleep
I probably snack ~500 calories throughout the day and drink ~800 calories of soda/gatorade
So my day consist of ~7500 Calories and thats on an average day, some days it may be ~10k+ and others as low as ~3500 Calories but that is how I got to the weight I did. It was no accident I ate those calories, nobody forced me. I have an addiction to shitty fast food because I am lazy. I would rather order mcdonalds delivery than cook a steak. Because I am lazy.
Now most people when they go to a fast food restaurant order a combo and call it good, not me. Let's look at my order at a few different fast food restaurants.
McDonalds (~3250 calories/meal):
3x McDoubles (~1200 calories)
3x McChickens (~1250 calories)
1x Large French Fry (~500 calories)
1x Large Sweet Tea or Coke (~250 calories)
Chick-fil-a (~3700 calories/meal):
4x Chick-fil-a sandwiches (~1800 calories)
3x Polynesians (~300 calories)
1x Gallon of Sweet Tea (~1600 calories)
Now this isn’t cheap, I spend ~$15-20 per meal that I eat out and that is just for me. So let’s think about the cost of this… I eat out around 15-16 times a week on average and the rest of my meals are paid for by my company or are me snacking on food I bought at a grocery store. That means I spend ~$1300/month on food, which from budget tracking is about accurate. That is a ton of money on shitty food, what an addiction. But that isn’t all. I also have to buy more expensive clothing because my sizes aren’t carried in normal stores. A cheap outfit for me is ~$150 without shoes and chances are that will only last for 4-6 months because of increased wear and tear.
My point of the last paragraph is being fat is expensive.
So where am I going with this.. Honestly I dont know. I purchased a scale so I could weigh myself, I have a dream of no longer being morbidly obese, and I obviously have the money to make a change spending 1300/month on food. So now it’s just a matter of applying myself and doing it which is the hardest part. What do I eat, how do I get my groceries, how do I cook, when do I cook, what if I mess up. The doing part of it brings so much anxiety riddled questions but I think I can move past these and get something going. According to a weight loss calculator if I can average 2500 calories/day in 2 years I will weigh 330lbs which is amazing but its still overweight and that is such a long journey. But it means I’ll enter 2019 at 499lbs so those little milestones along the way might just make it worth it.
After all of this scattered thoughts I know what I want, I want to do this even if I don’t know what I am doing, this is something I have to do. My body knows it by things I used to enjoy eating losing there flavour, my brain knows it because I’m not stupid, and I want it.
So this is me, I am 20 years old, I weigh 602lbs at a height of 79 inches, I wear 6XLT Shirts and 58/60 pants. I am making a change that will both benefit my wallet and my health (mentally and physically). I just want to be a normal fat guy not a super obese fat guy. Once I’m there I can look and set new goals but my goal right now is to get to a normal overweight size not be Class 3 Obese.
EDIT: Thanks for all of this kind comments I will respond to everyone, I'm just at work right now and got slightly busy as soon as I posted this.
EDIT 2 (6/29/18 12:03AM CST):
Starting photos: https://imgur.com/a/8hQokaD & MyFitnessPal: SpecificIndependence
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