Hello everyone! This is my first post and I am posting here to try and hold my accountability and document my progress! Content warning I mention my previous struggle with an eating disorder below, if that is hard to read for some people.
I started my weightloss journey 10 weeks ago at 218 pounds and at 5'7, the biggest I have ever been.
At the moment I am at 204 pounds and have lost overall 2.5 inches on my waist!
I started gaining weight because of my eating disorder 10 years ago. Stupidly I was actually at a great weight (140 pounds which would be a dream goal for me) when I started but I was so obsessed with the idea that I was too big and something was wrong with me so I started heavy, heavy restricting which led to binge eating which led to bulimia.
This coupled with a stressful relationship and a job that basically involves staying at home on my laptop all day was a recipe for disaster.
I have known for a while that I needed help and needed to heal myself but for some reason I was just blocked, living a sedentary lifestyle, exhausted all the time, going back and forth with my eating disorder and feeling miserable with my body, making excuses as to why things weren't working.
I'm not quite sure when I got the motivation to start changing. I just sort of...did it one day. There was no "aha" moment. I went to see a counsellor 9 months ago who turned out to be really great and started having regular sessions to talk about my body image and eating disorder. Somewhere along the line I stopped giving myself such a hard time...I started listening to lots of body positive podcasts and started to get into the mentality of wanting to make myself HEALTHY instead of punishing myself.
It has now been 9 months since I started counselling and I haven't fallen into a binge purge cycle which is honestly the longest time in 10 years.
Then 10 weeks ago I decided to change my diet and fitness. I started small, walking every day for 30 minutes. Then 45. Then aiming for 10, 000 steps a day and this became fun, like a cool challenge...and now I have also started aiming to do 3 or 4 workouts a week...things like HIIT, swimming ...and I have rediscovered my love of dance classes. I really would like to start lifting weights too though I find it intimidating.
I have been eating three meals a day and snacking on some fruit and focusing on things like whole foods, cutting processed stuff, smaller portions, paying attention to what my body actually wants ...because I have realised that if I actually pay attention to what my body craves....it very rarely actually wants processed crap? Like...I have also just been more mindful, the other day I had a cheat day and ate some fried stuff...and then afterwards I felt really bad. And not mentally like I would have before. I didn't have the feeling of "Oh god I messed up" because I have been trying to be very forgiving of myself...you know...if I mess up one day just get right back on it and start eating healthily again. But physically my body just felt sluggish and tired and bloated and i had acid reflux. I realised I had been feeling this way all the time when I used to eat this stuff every day.
Anyway. Basically I am trying to be super consistent with my eating and super consistent with my workouts. And it is working because in the 10 weeks that I have been doing this I have lost 14 pounds which is about 1.5 pounds a week. And it has just been steadily working.
I am so happy because it is the first time I have actually seen progress like this and the first time I have been committed to actually losing weight in a slow, healthy way. At least it feels slow and healthy.
I want to keep posting as I am so aware that I will probably hit a plateau at some point or lose motivation and I really don't want to. I really want this journey to be successful.
My long term goal weight is 162 which is 42 pounds away. Once I get to that point I will re-evaluate and see if I want to lose more, obviously I know that I started this whole thing 10 years ago at 140 pounds but I was younger then and maybe my body has changed. I also know I want to put on some muscle which weighs more.
I know that big mile stones for me will be 175 in 29 pounds time (because this was a weight I felt okay at before) and a really big goal is going to be very soon....getting below 200!! I can't wait till I am safely below 200 as I have been stuck there for a few years now.
Anyway. Thank you for reading if you managed to get through this whole blah. I want to post more and post progress pics when I have the confidence. You are all a huge inspiration and I wish everyone luck!
[link] [comments]
from loseit - Lose the Fat http://bit.ly/2ExlCyY
No comments:
Post a Comment