I never thought I would be at this point again. I just want to cry. I lost most of the weight two years ago and went to the gym regularly and I felt like I totally had control of things and said to myself “I’ll never let myself get fat ever again”. I was so sure of it, I threw out all my fat clothes so if I started to gain again, I’d feel the shame and lose it again.
What ended up happening was me gaining 60 lbs over a year and a half. I only have a couple shirts I can wear and they still look really small. So as the weather gets nicer, I’m embarrassed to even go out for a walk because I feel like everyone can see my shape and how ridiculously fat I am. I feel like everything sticks out. And I even still have my gym membership. I never cancelled it and it stills gets charged every month but I won’t go because I feel huge right now.
I feel stuck and hopeless. I can stick to my calories for awhile, but because I’m not exercising I don’t feel very motivated to stay on it so I end up binge eating at least once a week. I just don’t know what to do with myself. I’m losing out on precious time with my daughter as she gets older. All she’s gonna remember is her fat father that never wanted to go anywhere. Help
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