I’ve been trying to lose weight for years now. My whole childhood is just one long series of hating myself and trying to lose weight. Even now, I HATE that my adolescence is basically over and I couldn’t enjoy any of it because I was always too fucking fat.
I’ve realised now that even though I want nothing more in the world than to be skinny, I just can’t stop pigging out. I don’t think I’ve gone through a single week in my life where I’ve eaten healthy every single day. I’ve done fad diets, cleanses, plenty of just plain old healthy eating but no matter what I do, even if I’m not hungry I will always end up eventually bingeing. I’ve tried all sorts of CBT tricks, wearing a wristband to remind me not to binge, not having any food at home, I just totally lose myself in the moment and binge on whatever anyways.
It’s not even always eating until I’m uncomfortably full, even when I’m eating a healthy amount of calories I feel so damn hungry all the time. I just hate feeling like this out of control gross animal who can’t even keep her mouth shut for a fucking week.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2C8WHmx
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