And it's ruining my life. I won't meet my friend irl, won't look for a better job I desperately need, won't talk to people or put myself out there, won't join a gym or the rec center, won't learn to drive, won't go camping or travel, won't make new friends, won't even fucking save money. And I tell myself this is all because I'm fat. For some of that's it's true. For most I know losing all the weight won't make that any different.
All I'm doing is wasting my time, month after month, year after year, waiting for the weight to be gone. Waiting to be more comfortable. All the while constantly sabotaging and destroying my efforts and lifestyle changes. Even when all I want to do is succeed already.
I don't know what to do. I even know I'm being ridiculous and can start doing those things whenever the fuck, but my mind is just so goddamn set on no don't do anything because you're fucking disgusting and everyone will be watching and judging u and you won't enjoy it at all. I hate this so much. When all you want to do is change, but all you do is ruin your changes.
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from loseit - Lose the Fat https://ift.tt/2ldg1Xz
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