I woke up today ready for this fitness challenge, but also felt some courage to make other big changes in my life that are contributing to my unhealthy lifestyle. As much as I try to set healthy boundaries, everyone at work treats me like I’m their bitch and the gossip and politics is beyond what I, a sensitive and old school person, can handle. I go home every day exhausted, a lot of times crying or numb, and guess what I do? Exercise and listen to Ted Talks? Uh, nope. Try eat chocolate and binge watch Real Housewives and cry and complain.
I called HR and asked them what they needed to resign my job, took a deep breath, and sent a letter of resignation before I chickened our. I’ve been surprised by the number of texts and emails I’ve received. Like, where were these people when I asked for help or asked them to have my back? I’m trying to remind myself this is a good thing, and not go back into my old ways, the ways that were supposedly discarded, um, yesterday.
I don’t have another job lined up. The hubs got a huge promotion and that gives me time to either lie around and be lonely and wallow in self pity or get my ass in gear and reboot. I also realize I need to get a job to get me out of the house and maybe quitting before doing that was really stupid.
I have 100 pounds to lose. I want this to be the start of a good thing, but why do I feel like I’m just spiraling?
Thanks for listening to the rant. Any support, mantras, chants, prayers, all welcome.
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